Monday, September 8, 2008

Rebel with a hymen?

The VMA's were on last night, in case you didn't know. I didn't watch them- the ladies and I watched two creepy kid beauty pageant documentaries on the learning channel instead. Which of course was way more awesome. But anyway, I woke up this morning to read a bunch of crap about how Russell Brand made fun of The Jonas Brothers' special special purity rings, and how Jordin Sparks got up there and told him right off by saying: "I just wanna say, it's not bad to wear a promise ring, because not every guy and girl wants to be a slut, OK?" and then the audience cheered.

Yeah, stick it to the man!

Christ. I swear to god, that is the most irritating sentence I have read in quite some time- basically because it translates as this "Don't judge me for wearing a symbol of my parents' creepy over-interest in my sex life on my finger! The fact that you don't wear one makes you a dirty, dirty whore!"

Ugh. I don't get it. I especially don't get all the commentary about how she's being so "subversive and edgy." I also didn't get straight edge kids or christian punk. It's a thing I have. Shit, I feel like that would be like me saying "Yeah, bitch! I'm going to go read some Jane Austen and then bake a pie! Take that, establishment! Yeah, maybe I'll even crochet some scarves while watching Turner Classic Movies! Can you handle that? Am I totally blowing your mind here with my awesome edgyness?"

I am cool with the things I choose to do not being cool. I will rock no one's face with a recitation of The Lady of Shallot, and I completely accept that.

The mere act of doing something that not everyone else on earth does is not necessarily an act of rebellion. It is not necessarily subversive- especially when it is, in fact, what "the man" wants you to do.*

*Sorry- just spent a week with my mom. I'm going to be referring to "the man" and "the establishment" a lot for a bit. She rubs off on me.

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