Thursday, September 13, 2007

Gimme, gimme less, gimme less Ms. Shitney Spears.

Ok so everyone has blogged about it and more but I feel I need to at least talk about poor old '(You Drive Me) Crazy' Shitney Spears. Now to say Britney was bad is an understatement. I felt like I was at a nightclub were a Bachelorette Party had decided to come in and they made the bride-to-be strip down to her underwear and get up and "perform" with the strippers. Oh wait, I forgot to say the bride got a terrible weave before she went out AND took some Valium and drank at least three bottles of champagne.


As far as why would Shitney be allowed to perform? Well from a producer stand point it was win-win. If she was terrific everyone would talk about her "comeback" (even though saying "comeback" is ridiculous since she didn't go anywhere. It just seems like if you haven't done anything for the last six months you can get a "comeback") and say she was amazing and blah, blah. blah. If she was terrible, everyone would STILL be talking about her and everyone would be talking about it. Ta-dah! Press for MTV either way.

I've never liked the comparisons of Shitney to my girl Madge. Albeit there are some similarities but for good or worse (more often times worse) Madonna usually sings live and if she doesn't it's hard to tell. Shitney didn't even attempt to open her mouth for most of her performance. Again it was like someone dared her to get on stage and then she did...

Anyways, so yeah to me Shitney is more like Paula Abdul. Both known more for the looks and dancing abilities. Both have limited if no vocal abilities. They are both crazy, though we didn't learn that until later. They both had huge hits, made lots of money, were admired and imitated by little girls and... (drum roll) BOTH had HUGE bombs on the MTV Video Music Awards.

Does anyone remember Paula's Vibeology performance? YIKES! Oh and of course the be and end all to a career: a change in management. Nothing is faster, except Lindsay Lohan to a bag of coke, then changing your management team that helped make you a star. Hello? Tom Cruise jumping up and down on a couch? When they don't have the proper people reining them in, we get to see what they are really like. And no one really wants that. We say we do but we don't. We never needed to realize that Shitney is probably one generation away or maybe just a cousin from poor white trash. She did much better when we never heard her speak.

By the look of that stripper-wanna-be number she doesn't even have a career at that. Well, strike that, some podunk town will hire her to work the 2-4-1 Pabst Blue Ribbon night.