Tuesday, October 7, 2008

I am totally being stalked by Bill Withers, and other things, varied and sundry

1. Seriously, last night Nicole and I were at Estelle's, and like, right after I told her the story about the cabbie, "Lovely Day" came on. Again. Spooky.

2. I learned, recently, that "Nucular" has been added to the dictionaries (including my beloved OED) as an alternative pronunciation of nuclear. I assure you, it is not. You can't just go about changing the correct pronunciation of things to make stupid people feel better about themselves. This is what's wrong with the world. Entirely. People want us to change science because it doesn't correlate with their idiotic, delusional religious beliefs. People want to use the term "begging the question" to mean "raising the question"- WHICH IT DOES NOT. I am wrong about things sometimes, as most people are. I'm ok with that. I don't expect the rules to change simply so that I personally don't feel stupid. People have to get used to being wrong about things. If I give you the incorrect directions to a place in Chicago, and you end up in Missouri, I do not get to say "Well, that's what I feel the directions are, and because I say it it must be true." Soon, we will have no spelling bee champions and the world will erupt into outright chaos. This, I feel, is a natural consequence of the "everyone is special and a winner" aesthetic. There ought to be no "If you do something wrong enough times it can be right" rule in grammar, pronunciation, or spelling. What's next? Changing the spelling of "realtor" to "realetor?" Are we supposed to accept that it is possible for the world to be flat just because some people happen to believe it? Everything cannot be simultaneously true- 2 + 2= 4, and god damn it, nuclear is pronounced new-klee-urr.

3. Some guy I did not know sent me a shot at the bar last night- from another table, which was delightfully old fashioned/ more like something that happens on 70's TV shows than in real life. I said thank you, but did not actually go and talk to him as he was not so much my type- but still- kinda neat.

4. But really, if he really wanted to impress me, he would have sent me the amazing hologram "Footprints in the Sand" framed picture that I saw at the LaSalle Blue Line today. I'm totally serious. It would be the second best present ever. The best present ever being the one my friend Luke got me for my 19th birthday, which consisted of a tape of Harold and Maude, a copy of "Fleur de Mal," fancy chopsticks and strawberry bubble tape- which, at the time, was something I was especially enamoured by. Yay.

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