Nipple Rougin' in the USA!

Hey ladies! Don't have enough things to worry about? Well, after you get that vaginaplasty and labia pump you've been wanting, go and pick up a bottle of Benetint at the Benefit counter and rouge up your nipples! Because they're just not rosy and fresh enough! No, really:

Nipple Tint Goes Mass
Benefit touts Benetint as nipple paint.
By Beth Landman

In just one more sign of the stripperization of the Everywoman,
Benefit’s Benetint, conceived in the seventies for an exotic dancer to color
lips and cheeks, is now also being sold at Sephora and elsewhere as a
“kiss-proof and water-resistant” nipple tint. “Women want nipples to be pert and
fresh-looking, and this shade makes them appear that way,” Benefit spokeswoman
Alison Haljun says. “For a long time, the idea of a ripe, rosy nipple has been
considered appealing and alluring.’’ But aren’t the nipples usually undisplayed?
“Even if you don’t show it off, you know they’re rosier and more perky,” she
says. Sonia Ossorio, president of NOW in New York, says, “I can barely keep up
with keeping my nails manicured, much less this nauseating onslaught of new
beauty standards. While women are spending their energy, time, and money getting
their areolas just the right shade of pink, the Supreme Court is getting more
conservative and closer to taking away our long-fought right to reproductive
choice.”

Ok, I'm not a straight guy or a lesbian, but if I were, I feel like I'd probably be damned weirded out if I found out that the chick I was with was rouging her nipples to make them appear to be fresh and rosy. I know I'd be really freaked out if a guy did it.

However, for the purpose of experimentation, since I own a bottle of Benetint (for cheeks and lips, not for my boobs), I decided to try it out. Just on one. And in no way was it any kind of positive change, and in fact looked sort of bloody. I haven't washed it off yet, and I will tell you that I feel no better about myself with my one nipple looking this way. In fact, I feel really weird about it.

Now, I will tell you that I do indeed own a thing of strawberry flavored nipple gloss. But it was a dollar at the porn store and I bought it because, well, that's just too funny and how could I not buy it, right? And also it works as lip gloss. However, I must tell you, that no one has ever complained that my nipples were not fresh and rosy looking enough, or glossy or strawberry flavored enough. Never in my life. It's never, ever happened. And, frankly, I would put money on the fact that it never will. I have had nothing but positive reviews on them just the way they are. So, dears, my Benetint will be staying on my cheeks and lips where it belongs, thank you very much.

via Feministe