Apparently, Fox News is trying out its own "conservative version of The Daily Show" called "The Half Hour News Hour." Guests will include the always hilarious Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter!... uh...
See, ok, this is the thing- Republicans are not funny. It's pretty much a fact. I mean, sure- they have their comedic heroes like that Cable Guy or whatever... but he's not funny. I saw the preview for his movie a while back, and I was literally stunned that there were people who found him at all entertaining. Dennis Miller stopped being funny the second he went all wingnut. For real. It's not like I can't find people funny if I disagree with them- he just went totally flat post-conversion.
Because, well- I'll explain. Making fun of rich people- this could be funny. Making fun of the homeless... generally disturbing on all levels of human decency. It's not funny to hear the powerful making fun of the powerless, for the oppressors to make fun of the oppressed. It's awkward, yes, but not in any way that would be construed as funny. Also, how many Born Again Christian comedians are there? None that I know of. 'Cause, you know, while it's damned hilarious if someone believes that they are going to be vacuumed up into heaven someday and leave their clothes in a pile on the ground... it is not funny that people do not think that. Like "Oh my god, those athiests- are they wacky! They don't believe in guardian angels and the rapture!" Not funny. Not at all.
I have a feeling it's going to be a lot of fart jokes and varying renditions of "the gay voice."
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
It's still bothering me...
And by "it" I mean the previously mentioned article about the sexual assaulting cop. And, well... here's the thing...
Situation 1) Susie Creamcheese meets a guy at a bar, and flirts with him while wearing a diamond necklace, and later that night the man rips the jewelry off of her and runs off.
Situation 2) Susie is unconscious and some teenage boys film themselves stealing her diamond necklace, and later their parents describe the incident as "Oh well! Boys will be boys!"
Situation 3) Susie makes her living selling diamond necklaces, and then someone steals one of them
Situation 4) Susie has given away hundreds of diamond necklaces, and then someone takes one without her permission
Situation 5) Susie walks down the street late at night swathed in diamond jewelery and is mugged.
Situation 6) Susie has given a man one of her diamond necklaces once before, and he takes another, even though she said he couldn't have it.
Situation 7) Susie has fallen asleep in a man's hotel room while wearing a diamond necklace and he steals it
Situation 8) Susie is pulled over by a cop while wearing a diamond necklace and he steals it
Now, in any of these situations, is it justifiable for the person to steal Susie's necklace (which, by the way, has stopped looking like a word to me after typing it so many times)? No, of course not. Regardless of Susie's actions, or how she may or may not have "tempted" the thief, when taken to court, the case would be cut and dry- because of course, no one has the right to steal someone else's property.
And yet, these are all excuses used to justify rape and sexual assault. Are we then to assume that Susie's body is less her own property than a diamond necklace is? Apparently so. Because sex crimes are the only crimes where the victim is ever accused of being responsible for the crime. It seems these days that every rape or sexual assault reported in the media has been tinged with this whole "Jean Val Jean stealing a loaf of bread" vibe.
Why? Because in this society, a woman's sexuality is considered a brandished weapon- an attractive woman is a bombshell, a knock-out, a femme fatale. We allow men to see sexual assault and rape as self defense, as though a woman were thrusting a knife at their throat as opposed to simply wearing a short skirt, or being "overtly sexual." We allow the attackers to see themselves as victims rather than violent criminals. Like I said in the previous post, a tease is just a woman you think should fuck you but she disagrees.
Men often see women as being able to sleep with whomever they choose, while they are not. Seeing as how they are raised in a system of male privilege, this is a bitter pill to swallow. I cannot count the times I have had men in bars flip the fuck out at me because I was not interested in them, or "appropriately grateful" for their attention. In fact, just last week my roommate was viciously verbally assaulted by this creepy Superfans looking dude because she declined his repeated offers to sit on his lap.
While no one could be accused of inciting someone to steal one of their material posessions, regardless of what they do for a living, what they are wearing, or how attractive they are- victims of rape and sexual assault almost always are- and are also almost always assumed to be lying about their attack. Which is why these crimes go unreported the majority of the time. Sex crimes need to be treated the exact same way as other crimes are. Because no one is ever "asking for it."
Situation 1) Susie Creamcheese meets a guy at a bar, and flirts with him while wearing a diamond necklace, and later that night the man rips the jewelry off of her and runs off.
Situation 2) Susie is unconscious and some teenage boys film themselves stealing her diamond necklace, and later their parents describe the incident as "Oh well! Boys will be boys!"
Situation 3) Susie makes her living selling diamond necklaces, and then someone steals one of them
Situation 4) Susie has given away hundreds of diamond necklaces, and then someone takes one without her permission
Situation 5) Susie walks down the street late at night swathed in diamond jewelery and is mugged.
Situation 6) Susie has given a man one of her diamond necklaces once before, and he takes another, even though she said he couldn't have it.
Situation 7) Susie has fallen asleep in a man's hotel room while wearing a diamond necklace and he steals it
Situation 8) Susie is pulled over by a cop while wearing a diamond necklace and he steals it
Now, in any of these situations, is it justifiable for the person to steal Susie's necklace (which, by the way, has stopped looking like a word to me after typing it so many times)? No, of course not. Regardless of Susie's actions, or how she may or may not have "tempted" the thief, when taken to court, the case would be cut and dry- because of course, no one has the right to steal someone else's property.
And yet, these are all excuses used to justify rape and sexual assault. Are we then to assume that Susie's body is less her own property than a diamond necklace is? Apparently so. Because sex crimes are the only crimes where the victim is ever accused of being responsible for the crime. It seems these days that every rape or sexual assault reported in the media has been tinged with this whole "Jean Val Jean stealing a loaf of bread" vibe.
Why? Because in this society, a woman's sexuality is considered a brandished weapon- an attractive woman is a bombshell, a knock-out, a femme fatale. We allow men to see sexual assault and rape as self defense, as though a woman were thrusting a knife at their throat as opposed to simply wearing a short skirt, or being "overtly sexual." We allow the attackers to see themselves as victims rather than violent criminals. Like I said in the previous post, a tease is just a woman you think should fuck you but she disagrees.
Men often see women as being able to sleep with whomever they choose, while they are not. Seeing as how they are raised in a system of male privilege, this is a bitter pill to swallow. I cannot count the times I have had men in bars flip the fuck out at me because I was not interested in them, or "appropriately grateful" for their attention. In fact, just last week my roommate was viciously verbally assaulted by this creepy Superfans looking dude because she declined his repeated offers to sit on his lap.
While no one could be accused of inciting someone to steal one of their material posessions, regardless of what they do for a living, what they are wearing, or how attractive they are- victims of rape and sexual assault almost always are- and are also almost always assumed to be lying about their attack. Which is why these crimes go unreported the majority of the time. Sex crimes need to be treated the exact same way as other crimes are. Because no one is ever "asking for it."
Well, you know, she practically forced him to sexually assault her, what with her boobs and all
Wow... I really cannot believe this. Talk about "The Real OC," eh?
Apparently, now, if you are an "overtly sexual person" a cop who pulls you over has every right to stalk you, ask you to jerk him off, grope you, and then ejaculate on you. Who knew?
The thing I can't get over is how the lawyer went on about how, because the girl was a stripper, and danced on a pole, she was basically inviting the cop to "take some sex." What? Really? Is that like the "Take a penny, leave a penny" thing at a convenience store? Like, "Take some sex, leave your cum on my sweater?" Sex is not something you are ever allowed to "take" from someone.
Obviously, the cop wasn't convicted because of what the woman did for a living. If it was like, a nun, or a teenager, or anyone else- certainly, he would have been put in jail for sexual assault.
The lawyer also goes on about how "she was one of those girls who have learned the art of the tease, getting what they want . . . they’ve learned to separate men from their money.” AHHHHHHH!!!!! Seriously... it's just so, so wrong. So wrong. The word "tease" basically means "a woman whom a man would like to sleep with, but she disagrees."
Being a dancer, being a prostitute, being a "tease," being attractive, wearing a short skirt, having breasts... NONE of these things allows ANY man to "take some sex" from a woman without her consent. They do not imply consent in any way. Rape and sexual assault are crimes of violence, not passion, and not horniness. When is that going to be clear? Honestly!
Apparently, now, if you are an "overtly sexual person" a cop who pulls you over has every right to stalk you, ask you to jerk him off, grope you, and then ejaculate on you. Who knew?
The thing I can't get over is how the lawyer went on about how, because the girl was a stripper, and danced on a pole, she was basically inviting the cop to "take some sex." What? Really? Is that like the "Take a penny, leave a penny" thing at a convenience store? Like, "Take some sex, leave your cum on my sweater?" Sex is not something you are ever allowed to "take" from someone.
Obviously, the cop wasn't convicted because of what the woman did for a living. If it was like, a nun, or a teenager, or anyone else- certainly, he would have been put in jail for sexual assault.
The lawyer also goes on about how "she was one of those girls who have learned the art of the tease, getting what they want . . . they’ve learned to separate men from their money.” AHHHHHHH!!!!! Seriously... it's just so, so wrong. So wrong. The word "tease" basically means "a woman whom a man would like to sleep with, but she disagrees."
Being a dancer, being a prostitute, being a "tease," being attractive, wearing a short skirt, having breasts... NONE of these things allows ANY man to "take some sex" from a woman without her consent. They do not imply consent in any way. Rape and sexual assault are crimes of violence, not passion, and not horniness. When is that going to be clear? Honestly!
It was Brigid O'Shaughnessy!
Maltese Falcon Actually Stolen
Do you think they have a private detective working on this case? I kind of hope so. And I hope it's some world-weary guy who wears a trenchcoat, and chainsmokes and talksh like thish. Because I would totally marry him. Or, possibly whoever stole the Falcon in the first place- because damn, is that bad ass or what? Unless it was Mary Astor. I don't think I'd marry her. Or Bebe Daniels. Possibly Bette Davis, though (the Bette Davis movie "Satan Met a Lady" was based on The Maltese Falcon, and her character, Valerie Purvis, was supposed to be Brigid O'Shaughnessy). Because Miss Davis and I are totally soul sisters.
In case you don't know, I have this thing where I have always secretly wanted to be a femme fatale who attempts to foil a hard-boiled private detective. I watch a lot of film noir, I can't help it. Also, I really, really want someone to knock on my door and ask me if I'm decent, whereupon I flip my long, flowing hair back like I'm some kind of coquette and say "Sure... I'm decent." In case you have no idea what I'm talking about, that's what Rita Hayworth does in the movie "Gilda." I actually have a whole list of things I want to do that occur in movies that involve me being far more glamourous and smooth than I actually am. It sort of breaks my heart a little every day to know that I will never be described as being Garbo-esque. Alas, we all have our crosses to bear.
Do you think they have a private detective working on this case? I kind of hope so. And I hope it's some world-weary guy who wears a trenchcoat, and chainsmokes and talksh like thish. Because I would totally marry him. Or, possibly whoever stole the Falcon in the first place- because damn, is that bad ass or what? Unless it was Mary Astor. I don't think I'd marry her. Or Bebe Daniels. Possibly Bette Davis, though (the Bette Davis movie "Satan Met a Lady" was based on The Maltese Falcon, and her character, Valerie Purvis, was supposed to be Brigid O'Shaughnessy). Because Miss Davis and I are totally soul sisters.
In case you don't know, I have this thing where I have always secretly wanted to be a femme fatale who attempts to foil a hard-boiled private detective. I watch a lot of film noir, I can't help it. Also, I really, really want someone to knock on my door and ask me if I'm decent, whereupon I flip my long, flowing hair back like I'm some kind of coquette and say "Sure... I'm decent." In case you have no idea what I'm talking about, that's what Rita Hayworth does in the movie "Gilda." I actually have a whole list of things I want to do that occur in movies that involve me being far more glamourous and smooth than I actually am. It sort of breaks my heart a little every day to know that I will never be described as being Garbo-esque. Alas, we all have our crosses to bear.
The bitch is back...
I'm back! If you didn't know- my mother accidentally deleted my google account while trying to sign me out of it when I left Rochester. Which means I lost my blog. Which sucked.
Finally- after a long battle with Blogger, Notes From the Underwhelmed is back. Or I at least have the URL back- Google's cache of it disappeared so all of my posts are lost to the world because in the meantime some douche was using the URL to redirect to some video site. Not porn. So this means I now have to rely on new content rather than the obscene amounts of people coming to the site because they wanted to know how to pronounce "Sartre."
Also... there are new developments at hand. I shall soon have a new blogging partner at NFTU, or at another soon to be named blog (it hasn't been decided)- none other than my amazingly hilarious and fabulous friend Michael, also known as the (in)famous Miss Pandora Boxx.
Also also... I'm updating my blogroll, so if you've got a blog, or a site or whatever that you want me to link to, let me know (you know, as long as it's not like, porn or the National Review)
Finally- after a long battle with Blogger, Notes From the Underwhelmed is back. Or I at least have the URL back- Google's cache of it disappeared so all of my posts are lost to the world because in the meantime some douche was using the URL to redirect to some video site. Not porn. So this means I now have to rely on new content rather than the obscene amounts of people coming to the site because they wanted to know how to pronounce "Sartre."
Also... there are new developments at hand. I shall soon have a new blogging partner at NFTU, or at another soon to be named blog (it hasn't been decided)- none other than my amazingly hilarious and fabulous friend Michael, also known as the (in)famous Miss Pandora Boxx.
Also also... I'm updating my blogroll, so if you've got a blog, or a site or whatever that you want me to link to, let me know (you know, as long as it's not like, porn or the National Review)
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